These past few years have been a battle of uncertainty. I have been searching for a job in the ministry with many doors slamming in my face. Recently I had an interview that appeared promising until I got the dreaded call, “we have chosen someone else…” It was a heart breaking moment, and it has been a common moment that I have not been able to escape. The rush of excitement left me that day as I continue to wonder what, why, or when God will open the door. I still do not see where this is all ending, and so I continue to ride this path.
What does God say to do?
6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. -Phil 4:6-7 (ESV)
22 Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved. -Psalm 55:22 (ESV)
11 I will make Jerusalem a heap of ruins,a lair of jackals, and I will make the cities of Judah a desolation, without inhabitant.” -Psalm 9:11 (ESV)
5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.
6 In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. -Proverbs 3:5-6 (ESV)
Many people have shared verses with me that I know, but when you go through the waiting, the disappointing, and the frustration it can weigh… it can weigh A LOT! The emotional, mental, and physical toil on me and on my wife. God has been there by my side, bringing people into my life, and He has given what we both need as they were needed. My wife’s illness, not having any job (ministry and non-ministry), and this feeling of uncertainty.
What I can share is that faith is a daily life style. Trust is understanding that we may not see the big picture, but He does see the full story. I have been put to a point where I have cried out to God, and I do not see where all this will lead me and my wife to be. I have so many people praying that God will make my path clear, and that it will be sooner than later.
I also have been volunteering time to serve. I have been helping my new friend Pastor KM with his Youth Group. I have enjoyed meeting many of the kids, sharing my experience with him and them, and hopefully the future as I stay where I am currently at… waiting for the job to happen. I encourage you to find opportunities to serve, for when you are seeking God, you will find the joy to endure.